Bernard looked up from the grill.
“You’re late.”
“I know, I know.” Sally ran through the diner door, grabbed an apron, and slid behind the counter, tying it as she went. “I’m sorry.”
“Your car again? I told you I know a guy—”
“No. Not my car.” A smile crept onto her face. “Spider interrupted my shower.”
Ted snorted into his coffee.
“Did you kill it?”
“What? No—”
“Don’t tell me you’re afraid of spiders,” Bernard said.
“Guys, you don’t understand.” She pulled her hair back into a ponytail.
Bernard slid a plate in front of Ted. “It’s just a spider. Squash it.”
Sally opened her mouth to explain, then closed it again.
“I can’t do that.”
“The hell you can’t. Use a washcloth.”
Ted pointed with his fork. “Or the bottom of the shampoo bottle.”
“That’s disgusting.” She quickly washed her hands.
“Then rinse it down the drain.”
Bernard placed a roll of burger patties on the grill in preparation for the lunch rush.
“You women act like they’re grizzly bears.”
Sally shook her head as she dried her hands, grabbed the silverware tray, and started wrapping silverware.
“You guys really don’t get it.”
“I get it. You’re scared of an itty-bitty spider.” He mocked.
Sally bit the inside of her cheek.
“I’m not scared of this one.”
Ted took a sip of coffee.
“Then what’s the problem?”
A grin tugged at the corner of Sally’s mouth.
“Actually, I’m kinda crazy about him.”
Ted lowered his mug.
“Him?”
Sally shrugged.
“I might be in love.”
Bernard looked up from the grill, where the patties sizzled away in their own juices.
“Hold on.”
“Yeah,” Ted said. “Back up.”
Sally focused hard on wrapping silverware and not cracking a smile.
“What?”
“You just said you’re in love with a spider.”
A snort escaped before she could stop it.
“No. That’s what you said.”
Bernard pointed his spatula at her.
“Then who the hell are we talking about?”
“The guy I’m dating.”
“The guy you’re dating is named Spider?”
“Nickname.”
Ted leaned back.
“Oh.”
Bernard frowned and flipped the burgers.
“Then why’d you say you found a spider in the shower?”
“Because that’s where I found him.” She blushed. “And why I’m late.”
The two men exchanged a disgusted look.
Sally burst out laughing.
“You idiots thought I meant an actual spider.”
Bernard turned back to the grill.
Ted picked up his coffee.
Neither said a word.
Finally, Ted shrugged.
“That’s what she said.”
Bernard scowled a nod.


This gave me a good laugh!